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20 Awfully Weird Things Teachers Have Been Told By Their student

#1

 

A guy in my class introduced himself by telling us how he decided he wanted to study philosophy because one day he was really high peeing in the street and he saw a couple of people working and he wondered what they were doing. So he realized his passion was wondering.

He dropped out like 2 months later.

#2

We did one of those two truths-one lie bits. Girl stands up and says, "I've never been out of the country. I'm a twin. I love playing sports." I knew this girl beforehand and knew she didn't have a twin, so picked that one.

Nope. She had a conjoined twin that died in utero and had to be surgically removed and she's now missing the last vertebrae on her spine. Showed us the scar and everything. Apparently the lie was the first one as she'd been to Mexico.

#3

 

I had a student say a similar thing.

  1. I really like reading books
  2. I had a stroke 3 years ago
  3. I'm a triplet

This was the first few days at a new school for me and his twin sister was I my class. So... he's a twin right.

Nope. They are triplets but his brother is in a different school bc he's incredibly smart. This kid was in a special program one day a week bc he was smart too. So his brother must have been a genius.

His sister just sat there like "yea one brother is a genius and this does brilliant, I'm just me" (she was a fantastic kid but had a lot of self-esteem issues for obvious reasons)

#4

 

Less awkward than my situation. We went on a field trip with another class and befriended a girl. When we got back I tried to sit with her at lunch. It took almost a week to realize she was an identical twin and I had been sitting with her twin the whole time. She was known as the friendly approachable one and her twin was known as being kinda the bitchy one. I ended up being bffs with her twin. She’s so unapproachable initially that I wonder how many friends she’s made by ppl mistaking her for her more friendly sister.

#5

 

Had students (aged 11) sharing strategies for dealing with difficult emotions, one at a time in a big circle. One girl talked about digging her nails into her face whenever she was feeling stressed or anxious, and I had to explain to the class why self harm was not a good coping strategy.

#6

 

A student once told my wife that her daddy had a special device that he had to blow into to start his truck.

#7

 

My dad clogged the toilet this morning and that’s why I’m feeling frustrated’ -5 year old child.

I will say the question was “how are you doing this morning?” But I could barely keep from laughing out loud!

#8

 

I have IBS... My toddler once told visiting friends that "daddy takes long poops". I mean, I was having a flare up and had some extended bathroom sessions. But, dang little dude, not cool.

I'm terrified/amused about what he might share at school in the near future.

#9

 

Well, I'm 21 now but in kindergarten we had to "bring something pretty" to class for show-and-tell...I brought my mom's new bra and pantie set from Victoria's Secret lol

#10

 

In my psychology class, we were talking about the early signs of serial killers and the quietest girl who never spoke told the story of when she lived in Chicago, she had a friend around 5th grade who would always stomp on baby birds and once put his hamster in the microwave. Well his parents were having difficulty keeping up with his antics so they sent him to his grandmothers, who he promptly stabbed to death when she woke him up for school. So that was... interesting.

#11

 

Well shit, did his grandmother live in Michigan by any chance? Because I have a student that did this. Actually, probably not the same because his grandma did not end up dying from it. His sentence was scarily short and we are all terrified of the possibility of him returning to school this year. Have spoken up and was basically told there’s nothing we can do about it.

#12

 

I am not a teacher but this guy in my class named Shane has this medical condition that causes him to grow tons of hair at an early age. Full beard in middle school. He would say “I’m Shane and I’m Very Hairy.”

#13

 

During French class, A guy in my class said that he liked stabbing children. He meant that he fences but didn't know the exact translation for that.

#14

 

That he has been to juvie multiple times and is currently on probation. Then he pulled up his pants enough that everyone could see his ankle monitor. That was...something.

#15

 

"I've had my hand up a sheep's bum" shocked me slightly.

Child of a farming family, helping with lambing season......

#16

 

I know they do that to cows to check if they see pregnant

edit: some people mentioned, it was to impregnate them not to check if they are pregnant. edit 2: apperantly it is also done to check if they're pregnant

final edit hopefully: I'm not sure what's right and what's wrong but just read the replies before replying yourself.

#17

 

My friend is really quiet, he doesn’t really talk unless talked to. He’s really cool though and has some things he enjoys doing. Literally second year I knew him the teacher asked this and he said he’s a professional bowler with a 300 best, and I was like WHY HAVENT YOU TOLD ME THIS THATS AMAZING? I guess it just never came up. Haha! Knew him for a whole year and never knew that.

#18

 

When i was in my first year at university my Law and Society professor made each student get up, say his/her name and tell why they picked Law School, well, a guy got up, said his name and the professor interrupted him by asking "Anon, are you related to x?" The guy "Yes professor, he is my grandfather" then the professor got excited and started talking about what great of a guy X is and that he haven't heard of him in years. Then the professor asked how he was, anon replied "He is dead sir" The whole class was trying to hold the laughter, it pretty much broke the class that First day

#19

 

Student told me that there is a chapter dedicated to him in a dental surgery textbook because of a very rare disorder that he had as a child. I may still have that essay

#20

 

I was an ESL teacher in Indonesia and a student once told me every morning she cleaned the shit on her bed. I asked her to clarify, worried she had a serious digestive issue. She answered: "I brush my teeth, wash face and clean bed shit." Bed sheet.

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Written by Samantha Clarkson

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21 Awfully Weird Things Teachers Have Been Told By Thei